For Those who Need Cheering Up Today

Tiveria

Tiveria

Sheeptastic!
An elderly couple, Ray and Bessie recently moved to Texas. Ray has always
wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he
buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into
the house and says to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?"

Bessie looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated, Ray storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back
into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again, he
asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different now??"

Bessie looks up and says, "Ray, what's different? It's hanging down
today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again
tomorrow."

Furious, Ray yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!!"

To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Ray. Shoulda bought a hat!"

Thank you mom :)
 
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Tiveria @ Jun 21 2006, 03:58 PM) [snapback]88755[/snapback][/center]
An elderly couple, Ray and Bessie recently moved to Texas. Ray has always
wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he
buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into
the house and says to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?"

Bessie looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated, Ray storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back
into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again, he
asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different now??"

Bessie looks up and says, "Ray, what's different? It's hanging down
today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again
tomorrow."

Furious, Ray yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!!"

To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Ray. Shoulda bought a hat!"

Thank you mom :)
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Click to expand...
lol :lol:
 
A man gets onto his plane, sits down in his seat, and notices that both him nad the man sitting next to him both have black eyes.
So the man asks "Sir, I dont mean to bother you, but I couldnt help but notice that we both have black eyes. And I was wondering how you got yours."
The second man looks embarrased and says, "Well, I was down at the ticket counter, and the ticket lady was this beautiful blonde girl with these huge tits, and i had a Fraudian slip. I meant to say 'Can I get a ticket to Pitsburg', and I accidentally said 'Can i get a picket to Titsburg', and she jumped over the counter and slugged me."
Well the first guy's jaw drops, and he says "Thats amazing! The same thing happened to me and my wife this morning!! I ment to say 'Honey, can you pass me the Cheerios?' and i accidentally said 'you fucking bitch, you ruined my life!!!!!' "
 
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